Summer Plans

Summer is just around the corner and I don’t know how much longer I can go on. My running through the finish line is more like a slow and painful crawl. The last possible day that I could be on campus is May 3rd, and that day could not come any sooner. I do have a lot of work to finish before then, unfortunately.

In my Spanish class, I am trying to finish with an A but I don’t know if it is possible. I would have to completely slay my final, and that could potentially be very difficult. If I come out with an 88 or 89, I will actually spontaneously combust.

I also only have one test left in my psychology class. My professor has a really cool rule, if my average is an A before the final, I won’t have to take the final. I currently have a 90… I have one more test left before the final. If I don’t royally screw it up, I will be okay because I also turned in some extra credit papers.

I also have about 2 weeks to finish an entire website from scratch. That is going to be the biggest assignment that I have to finish. I just don’t have any creative juices left in my brain. They have been completely wiped out from this school year. I am trying to find something really interesting to write on and about, but it is hard for me to not see it as cliché. My brain has been fighting with me lately, but I will be victorious at all costs.

See you next week.

Waitlisted.

So as some of you may know, I have applied for the Disney College Program internship three times now. On April 14th, it was supposed to be the last possible day to hear back from the recruiters at Disney as to whether or not we had been accepted. In the past, I have waited until the last possible day and just been declined.

Of course, Disney has teased me once again, and put me on a waitlist. So I have neither been denied or accepted just yet. The email that they sent me was very generic. They basically said that I will continue to be in consideration for two more weeks, until April 28th. It also includes the line saying that they anticipate more openings to happen and so I don’t really know how to interpret that.

I am trying to be hopeful that more openings will come about, but I am also trying to be realistic and make plans for next semester. What are the chances that I get accepted now? I have zero idea and it is driving me mad. I really want to be in Orlando next semester instead of school, but Disney is dragging this out and making it difficult to plan. Hopefully, good vibes will be coming my way and I will be able to get in soon. I don’t want to be given hope from this email just to have it taken away again.

More Current Tunes

I am continuing my playlist from last week’s post. I am enjoying so much finding these new songs, and I love sharing them even more. My playlist has grown so fast lately because I really spend all of my time on Spotify.

  1. No Woman– Whitney: I actually found this song when I was on YouTube a couple of weeks ago. It gives me some indie Beach Boys Vibes.
  2. Portland- Drake: This song has a great beat. I also am madly in love with Drake, every since he was Jimmy on Degrassi. Trust me when I say that I never thought he would have a successful rap career.
  3. Concrete- Tom Odell: Tom has had a couple of great songs, and Concrete is no exception. He kind of reminds me of Ed Sheeran in a way but still very different. I am excited to hear more form him.
  4. Ascension- Gorillaz: The Gorillaz took a loooooooong break, but they are finally back. Their songs are still so Gorillaz sounding if that makes any sense. They are still animated geniuses, and it is on my bucket list to see them live in concert, If they ever play a festival in England again, I WILL HAVE TO GO.
  5. Sign of the Times- Harry Styles: Now I might be a little biased to my baby Harry. I have been a One Direction fan since their beginning. I saw them in concert in Atlanta in 2012, and I wish everyday that I could relive that experience.

But I will say this, Sign of the Times is an amazing song. I think he has finally produced a sound that has been lacking in mainstream music. I feel very glam rock and Bowie-esque when I hear the song. That is 100% what he was going for, and he succeeded. I hope that he can continue to surprise me, and go down in history as a rock legend.

Current Tunes

I recently dove really deep in Spotify to find new music. I don’t really enjoy listening to the radio anymore because they play the same songs over and over. After really scouring other playlists and just form hearing songs every once in a while, I have created a Current personal playlist. I just thought that I would share with you what songs I have put on there.

Now the title “current” might be a little deceiving because not all of these songs have come out recently. I have songs that are 30 or 40 years old on there. But, the title comes from my currently listening to them.

  1. Where’s My Love– Syml: This song is best in its acoustic version. It is a good song to listen to when you are driving home late at night.
  2. Here Comes the Sun- The Beatles: This song is just a classic, and if it doesn’t make you feel happy then you need to figure out your life.
  3. Wish I Knew You- The Revivalists: The Revivalists are form New Orleans so they are basically a hometown band. They play in Downtown Mobile all the time anyway. I love the music video, and the song being good is just an added bonus.
  4. Knife Edge: Matt Corby: Matt Corby is probably one of the best voices in his genre. His songs are so full of heart, and Knife Edge is no exception.
  5. Real Love Baby: Father John Misty: FJM is a character in and of himself. Just read his recent interview that he did with Rolling Stone and you will understand.

Theres more on my playlist but I will update you next time!

Hello again.

I haven’t done just a simple update in a while. I am getting ready to make plans for the last couple of semesters of college. It is scary to think that I am almost done, but I also have so much that I want to fit in before I graduate. The two main ones: The Disney College Program and Study Abroad.

I have applied for the DCP 3 times now, and I have yet to get in. I am getting a little discouraged, but it is a huge dream of mine to do it. Hopefully within the last two weeks that I can hear back for this season and next season, I will be accepted. If not, I can always wait until the semester after I graduate, but I will need to be looking for job.

Study abroad is giving me a lot of anxiety. I have to choose exactly where I want to go, big city or smaller town. Europe or Australia. Do I want to go to an English speaking country to not? Which school to go to. Is it worth it? Will I even be able to pay for it? If not, are taking loans out for it worth it? I am scared of the experience that I might get, but I think that forcing myself to go will help a lot.

4 semesters left (hopefully!) and hopefully I will be able to fit exactly what I want to do in it.

Making Decisions

Currently, I am 20 years old and I still live at home. I have a job but it doesn’t provide enough for me to live on my own completely independently. As I have said before in my blog post, I feel stuck. I am tired of still living with my parents, but I am afraid to be on my own. Soon, a decision will have to be made regarding my future plans.

I am considering just taking the plunge and transferring to a school in Seattle, Washington. It is far away from Mobile, and I will have to figure out things by myself. Unfortunately, going to that school will require me to take out student loans that I don’t currently have to do for South Alabama. That is my biggest concern. Do I go into debt hopefully for a better situation, or stay at home and stay out of debt and eventually still have to move.

I am applying for multiple internships that will give me some time to save a little and see what the plan is. I am planning on visiting the University of Washington within the next month or two, and if I like the tour enough, I will apply for the Spring semester.

So pray for me, or send good vibes and positive thoughts my way. Whatever you believe in, it doesn’t matter.  I need all the help I can get at this point!

Anxiety in the Future.

Recently, I have been worrying about my future. I have never been a fair of the uncertain. I am a fan of plans and not changing them. But with jobs, internships, and the future, I am losing my mind.

I look in the mirror everyday and see more and more gray hairs. I swear that I will be fully gray by the time I am 30. It seems like most people tell me that, “oh it will all work out in the end.” Well that doesn’t make me feel any better.

Ever since I can remember, I am have never dealt with being overwhelmed well at all. On top of that, I have anxiety about the smallest of details. I am also a perfectionist. This is just a recipe for disaster. I remember mistakes that I made years ago like it was just yesterday.

With time, I have learned to cope a little with my anxiety and fear. It still is one of my demons, and I don’t think that I will ever fully be comfortable.

My mind just constantly thinks about what can go wrong, and tells me that I’m not good enough or that I am not going to get what I want in life.

I try my hardest to not let that affect my relationships and friend ships. I have always felt like putting the burden on others is even worse. As a result, I don’t like opening up to other people.

Hopefully in the future, I won’t fret so much about THE FUTURE. Constantly, I try to find tools that will help ease my worry. I actually do think the blogging has helped a lot. I can really figure out what is so troubling. And talking or writing about it, makes it less of a problem.

I plan to keep blogging in the future, I know that for sure. That is one thing that I am  not worried about at all.